EMOTIONAL HIJACKING IN COACHING
Emotional hijacking, also known as an amygdala hijack, occurs when the brain’s emotional center (the amygdala) overrides the rational thinking part (the prefrontal cortex), leading to impulsive reactions. This process can be visualized as follows:
- Trigger Event: An external stimulus, such as a sudden loud noise or a confrontational remark, is perceived.
- Sensory Processing: The sensory information is sent to the thalamus, the brain’s relay station.
- Direct Pathway to Amygdala: In situations perceived as threats, the thalamus sends the information directly to the amygdala, bypassing the prefrontal cortex.
- Amygdala Activation: The amygdala initiates the fight-or-flight response, releasing stress hormones like adrenaline and cortisol.
- Impulsive Reaction: The individual reacts immediately, often without rational thought, leading to actions like shouting or fleeing.
- Delayed Rational Processing: After the immediate reaction, the prefrontal cortex processes the situation, leading to reflection and, sometimes, regret over the impulsive behavior.
This sequence explains why people might “lose control” in emotionally charged situations. Understanding this process can aid in developing strategies to manage and mitigate such reactions.
Emotional hijacking relates to several ICF Core Competencies, particularly in the areas of emotional intelligence, presence, and creating trust.
Here’s a breakdown of the relevant competencies:
- Maintains Presence
Coaches must remain calm, focused, and emotionally grounded even when a client becomes emotionally charged. This ability demonstrates how to manage emotional hijacking in real-time, modeling self-regulation for the client. - Cultivates Trust and Safety
Addressing emotional hijacking builds trust by creating a safe, non-judgmental environment where clients feel supported in exploring their emotional triggers and responses.
A coach’s empathy and understanding help clients feel seen and heard, reducing emotional reactivity.
- Listens Actively
Coaches must recognize the client’s emotional state and listen for underlying emotions or triggers, which often emerge during or after an emotional hijacking moment.
This competency involves observing shifts in energy, tone, and body language that indicate emotional reactions.
- Evokes Awareness
Helping clients understand emotional hijacking and its impact aligns with this competency. Coaches guide clients in identifying their triggers, exploring the root causes, and creating strategies to respond more thoughtfully. - Embodies a Coaching Mindset
Coaches must practice self-awareness and self-regulation, ensuring their own emotional hijacking doesn’t interfere with the coaching process. This competency emphasizes managing personal emotions to stay fully present for the client. - Facilitates Client Growth
Coaching helps clients develop strategies to prevent or manage emotional hijacking, such as mindfulness, reframing, or emotional intelligence exercises. This growth enables clients to respond intentionally to challenges, fostering personal and professional development.
Summary
By addressing emotional hijacking, coaches support their clients in achieving greater self-awareness, self-regulation, and emotional resilience.